Tonight's massive Super Tuesday election returns should make for some top notch TV watching, but there's no reason why you should spend the evening yelling at political pundits by yourself. Whether you're a hardcore democrat or republican, plenty of your like-minded brethren are getting together around town to watch the returns and collectively celebrate (or commiserate). Besides the formal meetup spots, you'll probably stand a decent chance of catching some prime time coverage at Brown Bar and the Cloak Room....

On Thursday night, the Austin Film Festival will make you wonder what you would do for a joy ride as they bring us Blood Car, one of the surprise hits of the 2007 fest. Based in the not-so-distant future, where gas prices are over $30 a gallon and everyone's new mode of transportation involves Rollerblades, vegan kindergarten teacher Archie discovers that the future of the combustion engine may not lie in fields of green, but in pools of blood....

Joe Rogan is intimidating; not merely physically, but as an evangelist for stand-up comedy as a means of creative expression—as an art form. Rogan famously accused Carlos Mencia of stealing other comics’ material in an exchange that highlighted not just his physical stature but his wit and his dedication to the craft. Having been on the cast of NewsRadio, Rogan certainly has the credentials to back his convictions. We had a chit-chat with him earlier this week, in anticipation of his performance at the Cap City Comedy Club on December 30th and 31st....

Production still courtesy of Troma Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead w/ Lloyd Kaufman Live! Friday, December 7thAlamo Drafthouse Lake Creek (17329 Research Blvd)(7:30pm, $10)[info] | [tickets]Over the course of the last thirty-three years, Lloyd Kaufman's Troma Entertainment has produced hundreds of films, attracted legions of devoted fans, and influenced the likes of Peter Jackson, Quentin Tarantino, Trey Parker, Eli Roth and Takashi Miike. In fact, by Kaufman's estimation, the studio now owns more than......

Photo by cote on flickr Fans of creepy, overpriced and sort of socially awkward grocery shopping will be disappointed to read that after weeks of redesigning, adding more people to the store employee rosters, doubling the checkout lanes and stocking shelves with the kind of stuff most of us have become accustomed to buying, H-E-B is ready to re-open two Albertsons stores that had mysteriously remained open under the quirky Albertsons brands into the new......

Elizabeth Berkley is Nomi Malone.... Showgirls 2.0 with David Schmader LiveThursday, November 29thAlamo LakeCreek (13729 Research Blvd)$12, 7:30PM[info] | [tickets]The holiday season really is the most wonderful time of year, a time where we think about family and togetherness, and most importantly, psychotic strippers. As always, the Alamo Drafthouse really understands what will make our season bright and are reaching into their magical holiday gift bag to pull out a screening of Showgirls for us,......

Poster image from Wikipedia Starship TroopersFriday, November 9th / Saturday, November 10thAlamo Drafthouse Lake Creek (17329 Research Blvd)Midnight, $8.25[info] | [tickets]It takes a certain type of movie to make it to midnight-movie cult status, and on first glance the big-budget gloss of Starship Troopers would seem to preclude such distinction. When was the last time Con Air or Timecop played to a packed house of screaming fans in the middle of the night? But hang......

No plans for tonight? No need to call in for backup--the Austin Film Festival has you covered with a screening of revered cop documentary Sheriff at the Alamo Drafthouse Lake Creek. Filmmaker Daniel Kraus gets up close and personal with Sheriff Ronald E. Hewett as he brings about justice in Brunswick County, North Carolina. Critics rave about the intimate portrait the film manages to capture in little over an hour; according to the event site,......

Ah, the verbal blunder. The slip o’ the tongue. The stutter, the stumble, the embarrassing gaffe at the company Christmas party. You’ve been using language practically all your life, so why does your tongue continue to betray you so? The truth is, for just about every person on the planet, verbal blunders are unavoidable. We like to test ourselves with tongue twisters (why does Sally keep selling those seashells by the seashore? It can’t......

Alamo Lake Creek will be showing the mid-season premiere of Lost tonight at 9pm (the show's new time). You can watch the show on the big screen with others (no, not those Others), and we do believe the Alamo has a DVR so you don't have to mess with pesky commercials. Did we mention it's free? Be sure to get there early and claim your seats just as you would for any other show at......

TUESDAY [12] theatre • Hairspray at Bass Concert Hall (8pm, $18.50-$60) ® fashion/party • Blue Velvet turning their Cupcake Party into a monthly event! Every second Tuesday, enjoy free homemade cupcakes, a keg o' beer, tropical punch for the teetotallers (and, well, kids), DJs, and an extra 20% all their vintage threads. Tonight's tunes provided by DJ Polaris. At Blue Velvet Vintage Clothing (5pm-8pm, 2100-B Guadalupe Street) ® film • AFS Essential: Finger of......

MONDAY [17][music] The High Flyers at Continental Club (10pm) (link) [lecture] Josh Rushing, future host of a show on Al Jazeera International and "accidental media star" in "Control Room," speaks at UT LBJ Auditorium (7pm) (link) [art] Opening Reception for Michael Schliefke's newest works, "What If We Could Get It All Back?" at bolm Studios (6pm-11pm) (link) [film] Oscar-Nominated Documentary shorts at Alamo Downtown (7pm) (link) [film] Anime Movie Monday at Ventana del Sol (7:30pm)......

*Picture from APD taken from AAS site* Austin Police are looking for the suspect pictured above who robbed the First State Bank at 12730 Research Blvd. this morning. The suspect entered the bank around 9:35am and demanded money from a teller. He left on foot shortly thereafter. [Statesman] The suspect is described as a white male, 50 to 55 years old, with a thin build, blue eyes and a weathered complexion, between 5 feet......

The green chile is now in season and at its peak. To celebrate this in all its spicy glory, Chuy's has a Green Chile Festival every year for about a month. This year the fest takes place from August 29th-September 25th. Chuy's customers can select from a number of special dishes that are only available during the fest--dishes that pay homage to the green chile. There is the Elvis Green Chile Fried Chicken, the......

Get ready, motherf****s, comedian Doug Stanhope is coming back to town. The local favorite and extremely blue comic brings his acerbic wit and raunchy storytelling to the Cap City Comedy Club this weekend. Doug will have 8pm shows Thursday-Saturday, as well as 10:30pm shows on Friday and Saturday. If you have not seen Stanhope, and are not easily offended, we suggest you get up north and let this brilliant stand-up tickle your funny bone......

If you don't have a wristband for the music festival, or if you're an anti-SXSW nutjob who still wants to see a few bands tonight, you're in luck. There are a few great shows by local bands tonight that are free, free, free! Noelle Hampton will be playing tonight at BB Rovers (12636 Research Blvd.) at 11pm. Noelle sings like an angel and looks like one too. You can listen to her songs here,......