UN reports: Poorest people are most at risk through climate change. Dick Cheney's heart (ha) may be in trouble. In California, they drink sewage. Sort of. Russian hipsters carefully ignore Stalin, long for the good old days. Speaking as a nation wearing Native American t-shirts, we could teach them a thing or two about revisionist history... Living in the city makes your breasts denser. (This is not a metaphor, and it could be dangerous!)......

Former White House press secretary Scott McClellan blames President Bush and Vice President Dick Cheney for efforts to mislead the public about the role of White House aides in leaking the identity of a CIA operative. Police Chief: "Missing Student Ignored Due to Race." A drunken man broke into a central London park and attempted to have sex with a fence: Daniel French, 24, made "sexual motions" towards metal railings in Leicester Square Gardens......

Senator Barack Obama delivered a rousing speech to thousands of die-hard supporters this past Saturday at the Backyard, touching on just about every hot issue at the core of next year's election debates. Pledging to shut down Guantanamo, restore habeas corpus, and renew the hunt for Al Qaeda, Obama stressed the need for a stronger international agenda and quoted Kennedy's famous inaugural address—"Let us never negotiate out of fear, but let us never fear......

Hillary Clinton compares Dick Cheney to infamous science fiction character. Guess which one. Thousands are gathering in Jena, LA today in support of the 'Jena 6.' Republican representative claims just too many mosques in this country. The UN's General Assembly is next week and Iranian President Ahmadinejad asked to lay a wreath at Ground Zero. The NYPD is not having it. One heck of prank or one heck of a hangover. 100,000 cans of......

[This review courtesy of new Austinist contributor Anna Hanks! -Ed.] As much as we'd like to change a few things about our first time, we regret we’ll never be able to repeat the experience. We also can’t change history, so catching the currently playing, slick incarnation of the Rude Mechanicals' Get Your War On also wasn't our first time. (We reviewed the show last January as well.) Directed by Shawn Sides, Get Your War......

Barack Obama's campaign for the presidency of the United States is only thirteen days old, but standing in the middle of the crowd at Auditorum Shores Friday you would think it's been going on for thirteen years. The one-term Senator from Illinois has many saying he doesn't have the experience necessary for the job he seeks, but if you listened to him Friday afternoon, you might understand why most tend to overlook that. The......

It’s just a fucking word, people. Seriously, what the fuck? Steve Anderson's documentary Fuck, a hit at this year’s SXSW, takes an honest look at everyone’s favorite four letter word. Part comedy, part earnest anthropological exploration, the film explores our fascination with, and the power of, this ubiquitous swear word. The film features interviews with a host of fascinating subjects, ranging from our most recent favorite genius, David Milch, to Hunter S. Thompson to Pat......

MONDAY [13] film • Army of Darkness at Austin Java (9pm, Free) film • Blue Velvet with Free Pabst Blue Ribbon at Alamo Drafthouse (7pm, $9) film • Down in New Orleans at Spider House (8pm, Free) film • True Stories at Rounders Pizzeria (8pm, Free) film • The Notorious Bettie Page at Café Mundi (8pm, Free) film • Let Them Eat Rock with director Rodman Flender live at Alamo Drafthouse (9:45pm, $2) film......

It’s the primary season of the 2006 midterm elections across America, and the name of the game is “motivating your base voters.” So, bring on the rhetoric and rabble-rousing! The politicophiles at the Austinist offer you the following tidbits: This week, in Connecticut: Democratic Senator Joe Lieberman – the centrist, moderate candidate – lost his primary to Ned Lamont, the antiwar candidate. The Connecticut Democratic Party has united behind Lamont with passionate gusto. As......

Independent goober candidate Carole Keeton Strayhorn Rylander Cougar Mellencamp is suing the Texas secretary of state over his refusal to let her use "Grandma" on the Nov. 7 ballot. We're pretty sure the filing of a frivolous lawsuit will do very little to help Carole Cougar gain new supporters. It seems Travis County District Attorney Ronnie Earle is reluctant to release information about his investigation of Tom DeLay. In fact, he is suing the......

To us, it’s always seemed that the Constitution for which American soldiers have bled and died on the field of battle for a few hundred years now – from the American Revolution up to the present day – was really more of a tool for making our lives more convenient, rather than a safeguard that prevents Orwell’s predictions from coming true......

Looks like Dick Cheney will be spared the public humiliation of any further investigation into the events of earlier this week, as the Kennedy County Sheriff's Department has said the case is closed. But, we imagine, the damage is done. Literally and figuratively. Whittington said the shooting "was just an accident," and he was concerned all the media attention would give hunting in Texas a bad image, the report said. Give hunting a bad......

A piece of birdshot in Harry Whittington's heart caused a mild heart attack yesterday; he's in stable condition. The Austin Lawyer was shot in a hunting accident this weekend by his friend Dick Cheney. The Texas Longhorns were honored at the White House yesterday. Governor Rick Perry is posing a fitness challenge to Texans; the Texas Round-Up is a program being implemented to help Texans make healthier lifestyle choices. More locally, Mayor Will Wynn......

Guns don't kill people; vice presidents (almost) do. Guess who's having the Worst Week Ever. We would have to say that local attorney Harry Whittington is definitely in the running. After losing some property in the fire of a week ago that ravaged the KOOP building, Whittington was shot over the weekend. In the face. With a shotgun. By Richard Cheney. Yes, that Richard Cheney. The VP was on a quail hunting trip with......

Amidst heavy speculation, Steve Jobs reveals Apple Computer's newest gadgets ... It's still unclear whether Dick Cheney is suffering from ailments of his foot, heart, knees, or conscience. Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton claims hundreds of US soldiers died in Iraq because their body armor was simply inadequate The Governator reveals the cause of his big fat lip Bush attributes rising test scores to No Child Left Behind act Now the American College of Chest......

Beginning this week, Austinist will be introducing several new columns written by various contributors. These columns will run the gamut from thoughts on television (which you have already come to love) to dipsomaniac observations and the like. These posts will be spoken in the first person singular by the individual contributors and do not represent the thoughts/opinions of Austinist as a whole. Today, we introduce "Candy and Flowers," from contributor Carly Kocurek. In "Candy......

Nelson Mandela. The Dalai Lama. Mother Theresa. Mother Nature? Scuttlebutt around the internet and news services is that Mother Nature will be named Time Magazine’s Person of the Year. After a year of tsunamis, earthquakes and a record-breaking hurricane season, editors at Time seem prepared to name Mother Nature the POY. Some sites are even placing odds on who/what will win. And, Time wants to hear from you on whom you think it should......

Tom DeLay succeeded yesterday in having Judge Bob Perkins removed from his money-laundering and conspiracy case, complaining that the Democrat had donated over $5,000 to "liberal" causes since 2001. While a new judge has yet to be named, The Hammer's already working on his next weaselly tactic: having the trial moved out of Austin. Ridiculously, his indictment hearings have become something of a farce - it's hard to remember that the whole thing stems......

Vice President Dick Cheney's right hand man, chief of staff Lewis "Scooter" Libby, was indicted today for "obstructing justice, perjury and lying" after a two year investigation into the CIA leaks of agent Valerie Plame's identty. The Washington Post explains why this is such a heinous crime: Lying about a crime, the accusation against I. Lewis "Scooter" Libby, has itself been a crime since the time of Hammurabi. Then, it was punishable by death.......

On Friday afternoon, after the Senate spent more than 25 hours debating the appointment of Texas Supreme Court Justice Priscilla Owen to the 5th Circuit Court of Appeals, Senator John Cornyn (R-TX) filed for cloture. The immediate result of cloture is to bring about a relatively expedient end to debate; tomorrow, the Senate will vote whether to approve Owen's nomination. But if Republicans fail to get the 60 votes necessary to approve her, as......