While SFist cringed at the fatal dose of crime littering the Bay Area, it found solace in Hillary Clinton's San Francisco campaign headquarters opening, which featured loads of exposed mammary glands. In other news, SF Taxi Commission ruled that Satan's cab must keep its (in)famous medallion number, 666; and in an un-fashion-forward frenzy, San Francisco Fashion Week (chortle) bars bloggers from covering and getting smashed at their shows and parties, respectively. Also, they found a......

Ohmygoddidyouhearaboutthebigmethbust thatwentdownthismorning? Wherearewes’posetogetourshitnow? Whydoesthegovmenthavetobeallupinourshit! Ihaven’teateninfourddaysandi’vegroundmy teeth topowdernowthis?! Authorities from the Texas DPS and DEA announced today that, following two years of investigations, they have busted a major meth distribution ring that spanned across several counties. And just before the holidays. Damn Scrooges! So much for our alternative plan to eating turdukens and tofurkey until we fall deep into a turkey coma. . T-shirt featured in above image can be purchased here.......