Results tagged “chucknorris”

Image from Austin City Connection.According to the Statesman, our beloved mayor nearly pulled a Chuck Norris when a Monarch construction truck blocked traffic on West Fifth Street. Story is he got out of his car, walked to the construction site and ripped into the project superintendent. He later indicated that he was sorry if his vulgarity offended any construction workers. Many Statesman commenters noted that if the mayor thinks it is bad to get stuck...

Bush wants $45 billion more for Iraq, Afghanistan, and a couple other wars he's not even telling us about. Southern Californian fires drive hundreds of thousands of people out of their domiciles. Police officer in NYC goes off the tracks, shoots man in road rage incident. If that police officer wasn't screwed up enough for you... Republican voters ask: What Would Chuck Norris Do? MySpace soon to feature games (beyond the game you already...

Chuck Norris and his World Combat League had better work on those fists of legend, because there's a new breed of no-holds-barred brawlers coming to Austin this March. We're talking, of course, about the all-female Pillow Fight League. These fearsome ladies are Toronto's version of the Lonestar Rollergirls, and they boast similarly frightful nicknames, like Betty Clocker, Eiffel Power, and, our favorite, Champain. As in that delicious sparkling wine, but with bubbles... that kill....

FRIDAY [8] music • Centro-Matic, Those Peabodys, Pink Nasty at Emo's (Inside) music • Anagen, Two Guy Trio at Stubb's music • The Midgetmen, The Boxing Lesson, Sounds Under Radio, Label Me This at Red Eyed Fly music • Fireside Creative Showcase with Shrapnel, Lone Star Porn Star, Nooner, Hundred Year Storm, Bayta Darell, and a chance to win a Gibson guitar autographed by (huh?) Chuck Norris at The Parish Room music • Rescue...

MONDAY [4] film •The Royal Tenenbaums at Austin Java (9pm, Free) film •Fuck: A Documentary at Alamo Downtown (7pm) film •The Conformist at Texas Union (7:30pm) film •Blue at Rounders Pizzeria (8pm, Free) film •The Da Vinci Code at Café Mundi (8pm, Free) film •Sound Unbound 2: Modern American Composers at Alamo Downtown (9:45pm, $2) music •Bound Stems, Rahim, The Shells, Quiet Company, Bello Ragazzo at Emo's music •Moonlight Towers, The Alice Rose at...

Last Friday, we thought we'd celebrate Chuck Norris Day by heading out to Lake Travis for some beer and boating. While we were out there, we noticed something a little risky, a little attractive and a lot stupid. Once our hands dried, we searched around the internet and were surprised to discover a new trend that has hit Central Texas lakes: Kite Tubing. Okay, the lake's not really our thing so maybe we're a...

Mayor Will Wynn took a break from his hard work of trying to cram as many people as possible into a small area Wednesday to hold a ceremony on the steps of City Hall featuring karate legend and unfortunate pop-culture icon, Chuck Norris. If you are reading this, odds are you are live in Austin, so we thought you should know that this your city council presented Chuck Norris withThe Honorary Austin Citizen Award....

FRIDAY [1] music • Tacks, The Boy Disaster w. The Channel, Golden Bear at The Parish Room ® books • Jacqueline Winspear presents Messenger of Truth at BookPeople (7pm) film • Chuck Norris Martial Arts Movie Mania with Chuck Norris in Person: Sidekicks at Alamo Downtown (6pm, $10) film • Lawrence of Arabia at Paramount Theatre (7:30pm) film • Chuck Norris Martial Arts Movie Mania with Chuck Norris in Person: Code of Silence at...

MONDAY [28] books • Jeff Abbott presents Fear at Barnes & Noble Westlake (7pm) ® film • The Ultimate Garlic Experience at Alamo Downtown (7pm, $25) ® film • This is Spinal Tap at Austin Java (8pm, Free) ® film • Bunny Lake is Missing at Alamo Downtown (9:45pm, $2) fashion • Huge 75% off sale at FactoryPeople TUESDAY [29] music • Plastic Constellations, Fatal Flying Guilloteens, The Boxing Lesson, We'll Go Machete at...

Even as the stores sport back to school sales (which depress us, even now), summer lingers on your friends the -ists. This week's collection of links provides some of the best, worst, and oddest bits of summer fun. So, bring your laptop up onto the roof, make yourself an umbrella drink or ten, and enjoy this week's choice posts from across the Gothamist network. Torontoist (where it's 75 degrees F as of this writing)...

Dateline: Budapest. Mullet-wearing, cowboy boot-wearing, justice-keeping, Texas martial arts phenom Chuck Norris is close to putting another feather in his black belt. Or something. Hungarian government officials need a name for a new bridge that crosses the Danube in Budapest. Being the grand, tech-savvy democracy that they are, they decided to let the voice of the people be heard, so they took the name-voting to the intraweb. And, not surprisingly, the leading vote-getter thus far,...

It is the end of the story. It is night. The monsoons of the North Sea have laid waste to the land, and chaos reigns. Waves crash mightily on the beach, like angered beasts of some forgotten age. The assassin wears a black robe, only his eyes showing from beneath this disguise that blends him with the darkness, rendering him invisible. He stands over the man he was sent to kill, gleaming sword held...

In case you've missed it, there's a comedy revolution brewing in New York right now. Comics like Todd Barry, Demitri Martin, and Aziz Ansari have been drawing huge audiences of hipsters and regular folk alike with satire that owes far more to the silliness and irony of Steve Martin and Eddie Izzard than to the lowbrow Comedy Central/Def Comedy Jam nonsense that's infested comedy clubs for a decade. Among the brightest lights of the...

Maybe we had not been paying enough attention. Maybe it’s because we do not have middle or high school-aged children (that we know of). Or maybe we do not pay too much attention to things going on in the more conservative areas of our state. Whatever the reason, the fact that some public schools have been offering a course, designed by North Carolina-based National Council on Bible Curriculum in Public Schools, that teaches the...