Why Aren't You Erect? Showgirls with David Schmader

Showgirls with David Schmader
Wednesday, December 8
Alamo Drafthouse Downtown (320 E 6th Street)
$12, 10:10pm
[info / tickets]

We used to think we came off kind of ostrich-like until we saw Elizabeth Berkley's portrayal of Nomi Malone in Showgirls. Her ungodly ability to fiercely flap-flap-flap around, dance with icy nipples while so-totally-exasperated, and squeeze ketchup on fries with a flurry of inexplicable violence are a few of the things that make this movie a Cringe Classic. The Stranger's Associate Editor/Columnist David Schmader found more than a few things to marvel at as well, and he brings his renowned annotated Showgirls screening ("part art-appreciation lecture, part sit-down comedy routine") to the Alamo Ritz on Wednesday.

Filled with two hours' worth of Berkley's hysterical energy and more NC-17-ness than you could swing around a bacteria-infested stripper pole, Showgirls is pretty much hilarious sleaze that relentlessly humps your eyeballs. Similar to someone tickling you into pain and tears, you will laugh and then you will walk out of the theatre not wanting to be physical with anyone ever again. Proof in three words: Pool. Sex. Exorcism.

Schmader recently spoke with The A.V. Club and may have put his finger on what makes Showgirls good bad: "What does Showgirls have? It’s firing on all cylinders, but what are those cylinders? Constant surprise—so many bad movies, you recognize how they’re going to be bad and they play themselves out. It’s why bad J. Lo movies aren’t fun, because it’s like 'She’s a maid—and now she’s in love,' but there’s no surprise to it. There’s usually not an element of surprise and horror to the badness."

Through breaks in your incredulous gasping, you will most likely realize this statement is true. We're extra curious how Schmader fills the air during the most surprising, gratuitous, and harsh scene in the movie involving Nomi's friend, which definitely includes that element of horror that Schmader mentions. Guess something is bound to seem extra inappropriate when you're playing the how-can-we-out-NC-17-everyone game.

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