All too often, the trite epithet "The man, the myth, the legend!" is used to describe cocky frat boys with unusual keg-standing skills or sales weenies who manage to bag the boss and the big account on the same day. But truly, here in Austin, we have a man deserving of this description. His name is Fred Bothwell, and his regular appearances (alongside comedy partner-in-crime Joel Keith) at the monthly Midnight Special variety show at Coldtowne Theater are not to be missed. Fred Bothwell is the man (no one shall deny his feet-long beard). He is the myth (how can anyone sweat that much)? He is the legend (they say he was born days before the Kennedy assassination)!

Bothwell must be seen to be believed, whether that's while he's doing his trademark scream call-and-answer with audience members, singing songs about other peoples' virginities lost, or just standing around telling women they're "delightful." Come to Midnight Special for the Fred, and stay for the show. Over the course of the hour, there is much to enjoy. The Midnight Society improv troupe, comprised of a group of Coldtowne students, bang out reliably funny (if not as physical as one might like) bits based on just one audience suggestion. Last week's show involved vampires going "balls to the wall" with their bites. Delish.

Every performance opens with a gong show bit wherein any audience member who so desires is invited to spend two minutes onstage displaying questionable talents at the mercy of a booing audience and potential gonging. To give dear readers an idea of what kind of questionable talents we're talking about: during last week's show, a certain Austinist contributor (possibly this one) was asked the question "Hey, do you know how 'Shoop, Shoop' goes?" A certain Austinist contributor indicated that she did. A few moments later, a certain Austinist contributor found herself onstage, alongside stand-up comedian Kerri Lendo, singing Salt 'n Pepa. "Two Lovely Ladies," as the duo was dubbed, were not gonged. In fact, they won.

Which is to say, if we can do it, you can do it. Start practicing now. The next Midnight Special is July 18 at 11:30 p.m. at Coldtowne. Free!