Hots On #12: Justin Broadrick and Jarboe

Matt is on vacation. This week’s column was written by his twelve-year-old nephew, Perry.

Most of my friends don't get it, but I like experimental music. Most of it is way better than Hannah Montana or any of that crapola. Jarboe is one of my favorites. She is really neat, and old, and kind of hot. Yeah, for a weirdo old woman she is still pretty hot. That doesn’t exactly matter because you don’t see her while you’re listening to the CD, but still I just thought I'd mention it. She used to be in Swans. Justin Broadrick is old too, and I don’t know if people think he’s hot or what but anyway he still better-looking than John Goodman. He used to be in Godflesh, and now he’s in a band by himself called Jesu, which nobody knows how to pronounce. One time I heard Uncle Matt tell his friend, “Have you heard the new Jay Sue?” and his friend said, “Yes, Yay Sow is awesome!” Retards.

Anyway, Mr. Jay Sue and Mrs. Swans made an album together--well, like half an album--and since both their names start with a J they called it J2. (I don’t know how to make the “squared” sign on the computer, but imagine a small “2” next to a “J” and that’s the real name of the album.) Squared is when you multiply a number by itself, but you can’t multiply letters so I think it’s kind of a stupid name. But whatever, it still rules.

One of the reasons Jarboe is a weirdo is because she makes really strange noises while she’s singing. In fact, the first sound you hear on the album—and, for a few minutes the only sound—is just her voice with tons of reverb on it, singing a lonely creepy melody like you would not want to hear if it was very late at night and you were by yourself. It’s not quite as creepy as her singing on the album she did with Neurosis, but pretty close. Then Justin Broadrick comes in with some heavy industrial guitars and electronic beats, and it doesn’t quite fit Jarboe’s part but at least then it sounds like a song and not just a bunch of creepy ghost singing.

There are five other songs on the album, but I don’t remember them very well because I started making a sandwich and then I ate the sandwich and then checked my email and petted the cat and then kind of fell asleep for a little bit. I remember liking it, I just don’t remember too much of it—more ghost-singing, neato keyboard sounds, and some stuff that sounded Japanese or something. I definitely need to listen to it again, just not when I’m hungry or sleepy. And definitely not at night.

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here's another endorsement for justin broadrick + jorboe from an austinist.

i registered just to tell you that that was hilarious.

Great review, I think.

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