Narrowing down the vast selection of tacos found in Austin is a near-impossible feat … and claiming to be experts on the Tex-Mex folds is an assertion worthy of an internet ass-kicking. But we have eaten our fair share of breakfast tacos, sport tongues trained for tortilla-tasting, and feel pretty much obligated to share our worthy opinions with alla y’all. (And we’re ready for whatever verbal lashings come our way.) With that, we give you:

#1 Torchy’s Dirty Sanchez Taco ($3.50)

With three-item breakfast tacos offered all day for only $2.00, why would anyone opt for the pricier Sanchez? Because it’s heavenly, that’s why! Torchy’s isn’t shy on eggs—a soft, steaming pile of ‘em sets the foundation atop a flour tortilla. Next comes tempura-coated poblano peppers, fried to golden perfection, and tangy sticks of escabeche (pickled) carrots. A decent amount of fresh guacamole (never a brown spot) fits in there somehow, and the whole thing is topped with finely shredded cheese and comes with just the right amount creamy poblano ranch. You really couldn’t find a more perfect combination of colors, flavors, and textures, and the finished it pretty giant to boot. Eat it for breakfast, lunch, dinner … or all three, really.

Torchy’s Tacos
1207 S. 1st Street
Monday-Wednesday, 7am-10pm
Thursday-Sunday, 8am-11pm

#2 Quack’s Maplewood Icehouse’s Luna Taco ($2.99)

Ever show up to Quack’s on 43rd Street, only to find a cat’s cradle of laptop cords and scattered seats filled by all the devoted regulars who’ve been there all morning? Fear not: Quack’s Maplewood cousin is just across I-35 and offers an entire menu of snacks, salads, sandwiches, burgers, and tacos, as well as homemade baked goods from the O.G. Bakery. Save the Luna for those mornings when you wake up ravenous because the thing is as big as your head. Eggs, cheese, vegetarian black beans, homemade soyrizo, and green onions fill a big, soft flour tortilla. But the best part has to be the crunchy, golden “needle and thread potatoes” on top, a textural phenomenon made even better awith an avocado added to the mix. Feeling creative? Opt for the Artist Taco ($2.25 for any three items) and choose from any of the Luna ingredients, as well as cilantro lime rice, fried tofu, vegetarian refried beans, and regular sausage and chorizo. Salsa options include pico de gallo, fresh roasted red salsa, or their special guajillo blend.

Quack’s Maplewood Icehouse
1400 E. 38th Street
Monday-Friday, 7am-2pm
Saturday-Sunday, 8am-2pm

#3 El Chilito’s Migas Taco ($1.95)

Many a silent, hung-over brunch has been suffered at El Chilito, and we mean that in the best way possible. After a successful night of heavy drinking, there’s nothing we want more than a hot taco served up by the same tattooed hipster girls we partied with the night before (how do they get up so early?) Their migas taco doesn’t look particularly appetizing but never fails to satisfy—soft egg, melted cheese, and crunchy tortilla strips come together with finely chopped tomato, onion, and Serrano peppers. Order it on corn tortillas, if you know what’s good for you, and don’t forget to ask for their smooth, smoky salsa too (some people swear by it, others it grows on, but either way you’ll end up liking it). Order a frozen sangria to go with it and start to nurse the pain away. You’ll thank us later.

El Chilito
2225 Manor Road
Monday-Friday, 7am-10pm
Saturday, 8am-10pm
Sunday, 8am-9pm

#4 Mr. Natural’s Veggie Chorizo ($1.85) & Wheatsville’s Vegan Sausage ($1.40)

There’s nothing like waking up, gorging yourself with a lardy breakfast taco, then returning to bed for a nap … right? Well … sometimes. But if you’re feeling “healthy” or whatever, you might want to crunch on something with a little more sustenance, like these tacos (they tied!) from two of Austin’s hippie-food Meccas. Mr. Natural’s flavorful veggie chorizo goes nicely with potato, egg, rice and cheese, wrapped in wheat or corn tortillas so fresh you know someone’s Abuelita just pressed ‘em. They also throw in a little cup of hot sauce that has just the right kick to get you going, but make sure you ask for napkins—beware the chorizo juice! Wheatsville’s similar version is a bit bigger and a less oily with brown rice instead of the sticky short grain used at Mr. Natural and vegan sausage that is milder )but just as delicious and less messy.) Of course, wheat tortillas are the norm (it isn’t called Cornsville, after all!) and for salsa choose from casera (mild red), verde (mild green), hot chipolte, or the monthly special (this month: roasted pineapple…mmm!) Both versions are topped with a generous serving of veggies: lettuce, tomato, onion, sprouts, and jalapeños. Forget the nap! At this rate, you may even be inspired to do some post-breakfast yoga.

Wheatsville Food Co-Op
3101 Guadalupe
Daily, 9am-11pm

Mr. Natural
1901 E. Cesar Chavez
Monday-Saturday, 8am-8pm
2414 S. Lamar
Monday-Saturday, 9am-9pm

#5 Tamale House’s Egg, Rice & Guacamole Taco ($.85)

To enjoy Tamale House, one has to enter the premises knowing several things. Don’t ask too many questions. (Why are the eggs so fluffy? You probably don’t want to know. Where are the tamales? Clearly you’re a first-timer.) Don’t judge the guacamole but do fear the beans. Bring cash, order fast, and don’t bother taking a seat because your food will be done and bagged up before you can utter an ignored, “Thank you.” The place is essentially kind of trife (hence, ridiculously cheap) but there’s a reason they’ve been around for so long. Try their egg and rice taco and add guacamole to it for a couple cents more—suspiciously light and airy eggs, flavorful rice morsels, and guac that’s been shamelessly cut with lettuce and God knows what else. Get it on a wheat tortilla and don’t be shy about helping yourself to one of the consistently good and spicy salsas kept in topless Tupperware bottles.

Tamale House #3
5003 Airport Boulevard
Monday-Saturday, 6:30am-3pm

*Note: All these places serve breakfast tacos for the entire time they’re open … as it should be! Tacodeli’s El Popeye taco (eggs, spinach, queso fresco) was a close contender but you can only get it up until 11am … for shame!

Photo by GypsyRock on Flickr