News Bits! From High Tech to Fast Food
- Cops can spend more time at the donut shop, thanks to new speed detection cameras. But don't worry--they're only testing the cams in Hudspeth County and College Station, places you should probably avoid anyway.
- Apple releases Safari for Windows. Hackers hack Safari for Windows. Apple releases Safari for Windows 3.0.1.
- Dirty keyboard? Put it in the dishwasher. You might want to make sure it's waterproof first, though.
- Hamas forces seize Fatah security headquarters in Gaza City. As if the Israeli-Palestinian conflict weren't enough, the Palestinians may now be divided as well: Hamas in Gaza, and Fatah in the West Bank. Hard to find something funny about that one.
- Strike on Shiite shrine brings retaliation. So when will the whole world be blind?
- You're never too old for graffiti. Or whorehouses. (Linguistic revelation gives yet more meaning to "Puff the Magic Dragon.")
- Who knew microwave popcorn needed to be banned? Personally, we like stopping work for a while to evacuate. Gives us a little brain rest.
- Doctors overcharge without producing better results. Don't they get enough money from drug companies already?
- High school seniors get free cars for coming to school, and proceed to use cars to ditch college classes. At least they were only Chevy Cobalts.
- Foreigners get all the good (?) fast food. When will they start serving queso at McDonald's?
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