News Bits!

A guy in Germany jumped on the Popemobile, perhaps in homage to George Bluth.
Killjoys continue to tell us that we should be saving more.
A new website lets tween girls play with dolls online, thereby cruelly depriving them of the obvious POINT of Barbies: cutting off their hair and melting their legs with matches.
The CDC, Masters of the Obvious, testifies that that TB guy was able to travel because of "human error".
Laurie and Larry David are breaking up; copywriters make lame jokes about "curbing their enthusiasm" and their relationship "disappearing like the polar ice caps".

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