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![_The Preservation, The Dalles and SuperLiteBike at Beauty Ballroom [Show Preview]](http://austinist.com/assets_c/2012/05/the preservation-thumb-250x250-716401.jpg)
Truesday: Mind Ephemera
*The views expressed in Truesday are those of the author and do not represent Austinist as a whole. Thank heavens.* -The Editors
Alright. This weeks’ column is going to ramble like a motherfucker. I’m already operating on minimal hours of sleep, and I’ve had the Red Bull shakes on two separate mornings this week.
And there’s only been three days in this week, so… irresponsibility is awesome.
There’s a good chance that I’ll end up repeating the mal-glories of last year’s SxSW, but I might be too blacked-out to remember any of it. Sweet Jesus, I love this festival with every inch of my quivering liver!
Initially, I was really intending on writing up this deeply biting piece on how SxSW should really be re-named SxBeardFest this year, but a couple of things stopped me.
1. My face has a beard, so I’d be smearing that word-shit on myself, which in itself is never a big deal, but when combined with the subsequent reasons, it makes sense that this would be an issue worth raising, and I put lots of commas in sentences because I want you to stutter-read.
2. Everyone else has already pointed out that beards are the new Motorhead molestache, so there’s little point in highlighting their majestic trendiness any further.
3. Using the word “piece” to describe my column completely turned me off to the whole subject.
4. I’m still drunk from last night and beards are far too complicated an issue for me to tackle in my current state.
5. SxBeardFest is a really stupid name.
I’ve been drinking pretty heavy since last Thursday, because, well, if I don’t, it'll spoil and then I'll be responsible for the senseless killing of thousands, upon thousands, of whiskey trees.
Goddamnit, what is up with all the commas today? Shit, man. Okay then.
With all the free booze about town, I’m starting to wonder a couple of things:
1. Who the fuck is paying for all this alcohol?
2. Considering the levels I’ve already seen consumed, why is there such a dearth in the dancing scene?
Potential answers:
1. I don’t really care.
2. Must be that it’s been Interactive/Film so far, and those kids just don’t do “dancing” unless it’s in Second Life.
Pardon me for a minute while I slide into my Nancy-boy pants for a sentence or two, to discuss why dancing is for everyone regardless of your social standing. Especially when the liquor is free, and readily available.
Combining free-flowing liquor with dancing is how strangers end up having sex with each other.
Tah dah.
Without the dancing, it’s just a dark room full of blaring music and people staggering around telling lies to each other. Kinda like Foundation, or how I imagine The Cloak Room to be. Better to dance those lies instead.
I’m going back to bed. Long, beautiful week ahead. And for the record, I LOVE SOUTH BY SOUTHWEST, but I’m already looking forward to when we can all start talking about something else. Like, next week.
