News Bits!

You all remember Winnie Cooper from the Wonder Years. She's since developed a mathematical theorem.
In Katy, a 35 year old woman mothered an 11 year old's child. Consider that when choosing a babysitter next time.
Just say no to cheap beer. Seattle is.
California prisons will soon be distributing condoms due to the extremely high rate of HIV within.
Mayor Daley of Chicago is proposing the 13th grade. We think 0-grade might fly better with the kids.
Ummm, we lost about $242 in rent money somewhere along Highway 50 in Paddock Lake, Wisconsin the other day... yeah.