News Bits!
- Miss Universe couldn't take the heat of her tight and oh-so-heavy beaded dress; she fainted a few minutes after her coronation. A little sopón de garbanzos con patas de cerdo might have done her well.
- Major spas promoting relaxation are soon to be catering to pre-pubescent kids. A growing number of 9 to 13 year olds are stressed out with way too much on their plates.
- Looks like Chicken Shit Bingo is catching on in other states.
- We can't wait until this town needs a mascot for their futbol team. Okokok, we promise we're not in middle school.
- The Japanese have invented a bark-translation device. Now it will only be a matter of time when your best friend reveals all your secrets. You know you do shit in front of your dog...
- Buy a house on the side of a cliff and you might just run into a few problems.
- While smoking weed in Austin isn't generally frowned-upon by locals, Los Lonely Boys are...lately.
- Forbes' list of the Best Citites to Get a Job doesn't include Austin, but we didn't need to tell you that.
- Parker Brothers is now including a debit card with Monopoly.
- MySpace is branching out from pedophiles and murderers. A banner ad on MySpace infected the computers of millions of users with adware.
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