Austinist: Truesday: Breaking Cycles

brother nick

Wed, 03 May 2006 08:26:43 -0600

break-out!, cut loose, do your own thing.....

truecraig

Tue, 02 May 2006 15:39:25 -0600

Another set of innocents demanding their right to play at the card table, where they will eventually gain access (as everyone eventually does, because all really are welcome, for now), and then they'll see that there's nothing really there, and they'll inadvertantly take it out on whoever is demanding entrance next. Deception. Recognition. Repetition. Somewhat sad, really.

sean

Tue, 02 May 2006 14:18:11 -0600

I tried my damndest to distance myself from you and this crew at the time (especially after that one shoplifting incident), but these days I still wonder: at the time, did you honestly expect a bunch of thugs, cheats and liars to reward you for your hard work and dedication with a share of the stolen goods? Maybe that irony is one of the things you're trying to convey- struggling to work your way to the top of a bunch people who would rather steal than work? Hmmm. Hey that's what the real world is like even when you have a "legitimate" job. like, oh I don't know, going through years and years of school to get an MBA and a mountain of debt (hard work). Then getting a job managing some bank that charges $4 for ATM withdrawals and 34% interest on credit cards issued to people who make minimum wage or less (stealing).

Brenner

Tue, 02 May 2006 13:05:06 -0600

Yar, and don't mind me. After re-reading my initial post, the thought that occurs is: "Christ, who the the fuck do I think I am, some Editor From On High, or what?" I attempt a sheepish grin. I point a trembling finger at my half-emptied cup and insist: "Caffeine! The evil CAFFEINE is to blame for my temerity!" Sheepish. Sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeepish. Wow, that's really fucking fun to say out loud.

truecraig

Tue, 02 May 2006 12:45:36 -0600

Mr Brenner, I am flattered at the complimentary critique, as always. Yes, the last line is seemingly frivolous. But I needed it to end on a universal, rather than discrete note. I could have done it other ways, but that's what my brain shat out, so that's what I stuck with. Everything can always be better. Always. Narratives... Yes. I'm a big fan of them. But for this I needed the narrative to be the garnish, not the main course. Oh, and the shit-hand definitely fills up first. I've tried that experiment numerous times. 100% accuracy on that one.

Brenner

Tue, 02 May 2006 11:44:42 -0600

Nice. Damned nice. I wish you'd do two things, though: 1. I wish you'd lose that last line. Because that last line is a "duh" kind of line and drains power from what's gone before. How about, "Like SOME KIND of song," so at least you don't name the name, at least there's a maybe meager maybe pathetic but nonetheless viable moment of deduction for the reader: "Oh, Craig means like a BLUES song, like he was talking about earlier, god, I get it." 2. I wish you'd turn this essay into a highly detailed narrative. Because it's a compelling story, its resonances with The Rest Of Society and Human History In General are readymade and faintly sizzling, and I'd love to be vicariously immersed in the drama as seen through a more close-up truecraig lens. Get in there and go all rumblefish on its ass, hey? Yeah: I wish, I wish. As my balding, potbellied father has often told me: "Wish in one hand, shit in the other, and see which one fills up first." But you know this has all been by way of complimenting your writing ... WAB