Don’t Worry; Nobody’s Missing. It’s Just Clever Bad Marketing.

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We were down on sixth and Congress this morning ~~having a cigarette~~ preaching the gospel in the absence of Dwayne (Aside: how could they run off the ongoing theological debate between Dwayne and Leslie yet allow three-toothed meth addicts to plot their revolution while bugging us for our hard-earned change?) Anywho, we saw a few wide-eyed young folks passing out fliers with color photos and the words “Lost from Midland” written on them. Our ~~reporter~~ blogger instincts started tingling. (Or maybe it was the meth.) We asked the kids what the dilly-o was and if someone had gone missing. It turns out that these printouts were just the marketing tools of a firm paid to get people to MOVE TO MIDLAND…from Austin!? Huh? Yea, we don’t quite get it, either.

We talked to the kids and asked them for whom they worked and how they got the jobs, who paid them, etc. We all agreed that it seemed verrry strange: marketing some out-of-the-way West Texas burgh full of rednecks and ultra-conservative millionaires in Austin? And this is where they launched the campaign. We asked, “Isn’t it a bit odd to start a Midland tourism/recruiting campaign in a town in which most people are here because they do NOT want to be anywhere else in Texas?” They were as nonplussed as we. (Aside redux: nonplussed means the opposite of what most people think it does. We are not trying to be self-righteous here; we just want to share the love. Besides, now you can be all snooty and shit at ~~dinner parties~~ Austinist Happy Hours with your (potentially) newfound knowledge.)

So, fret not, nobody from Midland is lost. Well, not in that since anyways.

We wonder: What would it take for you to move to Midland?

Contact the author of this article or email tips@austinist.com with further questions, comments or tips.

By matthewodam in Other on August 25, 2005 12:01 PM 0 Comments

Comments [rss]

Mark Hammer

what is sixth sreet? i love everyone

mertha

God, Mark - you really know how to hit below the belt - not that you know about anything below the belt! I grew up in Midland and the people there are the best. They know more about survival and vacuum cleaners than you'll ever know - plus they can have an intellectual conversation without having to hang out on 6th street to pick up an opinion.

Alex

A college buddy of mine lives in Midland and works for an oil company. He is making money hand over fist. Midland isn't a place to live if you are young and single, but for raising a family and making money, it isn't as bad as its reputation. I have visited him a few times and I didn't find it that bad.

mark hammer

something tells me helen and paul are in cahoots. maybe they share a cubical or something. that's cute, kids. we shall all now lighten up. see you at the Giggle Hut, paul.

mark hammer

kisses, paul.

Paul

Hi, I'm Mark Hammer. I just flew in from New York and boy are my arms tired!!! Not only am I funny, I know big words like PURPORT!! When I'm not on stage at The Joke Jive, I sit around and critique work for small Texas cities!!!

Mark Hammer

let's see...where can i find a blog about my hometown of austin...oh, wait, here it is. no disrespect, lori, i was more dismayed at the comment about the flyer being funny. because it is not. nor clever. just a bad attempt at marketing. and as for the gent who suggests that midland got what it wanted - people talking about midland - i think they want people to move there or go spend thier money there. and none of the discussion herein seems to purport that idea. oh, well. lah tee dah.

xoxo

Lori

I'd like to know where YOU are from, Mark Hammer. There is no need to hate on Midlanders. And if you were so above all of the Midland talk, why would you waste your time posting something here? At least I am from Midland, that is why I posted something. Go find a blog about YOUR hometown and leave ours alone.

Mark Hammer

funny? jesus you have a terrible sense of humor. as far as a work of comedy it has none of the elements that make up good comedy. it is not relevant to anything. it is just plain dumb. i think the marketing genuises behind that waste of paper obviously got his/her MBA from phoenix university online. as for people lightening up, it sounds like there has been quite a bit if whistful talk about big skys in midland, that's pretty 'light.' i think the scariest part of the whole ordeal is realizing thru the comments how many people in austin are from midland.

Helen

I got one of those flyers and I gotta say, it's funny. Lighten up. And it must be working. Would any of you guys be talking about Midland today otherwise?

Adam

Warning. This isn't about moving back to Midland, morons. This is part of the military's newest attempt to recruit young people to go and die in Iraq. They figure if you are dumb enough to move back to Midland, you are dumb enough to enlist. And by the way, if you buy that, I have some ocean front property for sale in Oklahoma. Idiots.

Meredith

quick! somebody help me grab up all those fliers! don't let my parents see them or i'll never hear the end of it. they've been trying to get me to move back for years. i don't think i could handle being back in Bush country again.

lauren

i really wish i could get one of those flyers. i haven't been back to midland in a while, and i feel no need to go back home any time soon. pumpjack drinking is fun and all, but i'm happy to be of the midlander variety that can laugh about my hometown and enjoy austin because it is the exact opposite kind of city. plus, there aren't any billboards here with bush grinning and giving a thumbs up. i hope.

Lori

The posters sounds so funny! I guess that makes me "lost from Midland" too since I now live in Austin. I probably won't move home next week but it does make me want to go back for a visit. The Midland SKY is the prettiest there is and I miss it!

Jooley_Ann

Someone who knows what nonplussed means! I am so thrilled! I am...plussed! ;-)

Now if y'all could get your apostrophes in order....

lauri

I'd have to have enough money to be able to travel the world indefinitely so I never have to be at home for me to move back to Midland. It really is a worthless place. Yeah, the sunsets are nice, but they're nicer in more beautiful places.

sunomi

First let me say that my husband and I are both from Midland.....both raised there, but met here. In response to your wonder, we've already discussed and agreed that one of our parents would have to fall terminally ill or pass away before we'd move back. Midlanders are a unique breed of people, though. When you have to accept that your role models are Clayton Williams and George Bush....when the biggest weekend thrill in town is watching Bud-Lit football players ride pump jacks....when you learn to become a defensive driver by dodging tarantulas, tumbleweeds, and rabid jackrabbits....you tend to develop either a genuine love for this life or you [hopefully] get out and learn that the dustbowl you've grown to know as home only exists because of all the black gold floating beneath it. Those are some unbelievable sunsets...that much is true.

caleaelena

I think I'd rather move back to Van Horn than move to Midland.

odam

i doubt it. too easy. besides, i already aced the MCAT. rwwwaaaarr!

Lisa

Do you think "nonplussed" will be on the GREs?

westxn

A) Its not in the Panhandle, its in West Texas, 2 different regions entirely. No other letters will follow, but I'm leaving the A.

I spent my first 18-20 years in a town that considered Midland "the Big City." I mean, it has a mall and Best Buy. But yeah its pretty shitty. I still love the land, climate, SKY, etc., but the people and way of thinking is just way too stagnant.

If I had the freedom to do as I please (take the drugs I want; kick the asses I want to) without any reprocussions (not going to bother to look it up), I might move back.