Bad News Bears Premiere

Ahhhh. Summertime youth baseball.

We remember those wonder years when we took on the Yankees after a highly improbable season engineered by our drunken curmudgeon of a coach who, nowadays, would probably be executed on the spot by rabid soccer moms for yelling at errr.. "motivating" us. (Not to mention supplying us with, gasp, beer after our final game!)

Do you remember that time when he recruited his ex-girlfriend's daughter, Amanda, to pitch and we were all like, "Jews, spics, niggers, and now a girl?" and she was all, "Grab a bat, punk!" and she proceeded to spank us with her mad pitching skills which would give us the edge we needed to eventually make it to the championship game?

That was so wacky and silly!

Of course, we all knew Amanda would later fall in love and enter into an ill-fated marriage with another angry sports character lending evidence to the theory that we look for our parents (or parent-like figures) in our life mates, but we didn't say anything because we liked the idea of her wearing the required jock strap.

OH! Speaking of jocks! Let's not forget dreamboat bad-boy Kelly Leek and his devil-may-care contempt for grown-ups. Your Harley did turn us on, baby! It so did.

See, we were just a group of misfits and ne'er-do-well's; we learned that we should never give up and that winning isn't everything, because we all would eventually end up losers.

But, dammit, we would laugh and laugh through all the ensuing hilarity as we fought for all underdogs using our mildly politically incorrect pottymouths.

Flash forward about 27 years later and we're back.

Sadly, we're not optimistic about Linklater's remake because, well, all remakes suck. And remakes of sucky 70's movies suck even worse.

Nonetheless, we grew up with the Bears and, frankly, love them. We knew them before they went to Japan; we even remember the tv show, for crying out loud!

So, yes, we'll be at the premiere tonight. You should go to.

BAD NEWS BEARS Premiere
Paramount Theatre - 713 Congress Ave.
Wed. July 20, 6:00 PM
Join Richard Linklater and the entire Bears team for a special Q&A after the screening!

"Listen, Lupus, you didn't come into this life just to sit around on a dugout bench, did ya? Now get your ass out there and do the best you can." - Coach Buttermaker