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Austinist Runs, And Not Just From the Law!
This past July 4th at the heinous crack of dawn, Team Austinist showed up in full force to take on the first-ever Silicon Labs Marathon Relay. It was a hot and sweaty four hours (we truly, truly wish we were talking about our bedroom antics) and by the time we left the Austin High School staging grounds, we were physically beaten and emotionally distraught (that sounds more familiar). But, by George, we finished it!
Of course, the whole point of entering this year's Marathon Relay was for our team to get a sense of what amazing running trails Town Lake has to offer, not to mention gawking at the astoundingly fit active population in Austin. Several of us quit smoking while training for the race, one member had just come off the grueling Danskin triathlon, and most of us generally distrust the early morning hours. In other words, we weren’t planning to set any speed records.
We gathered the night before for a pre-race pasta binge at Vinni's on Barton Springs, where we stuffed our faces with more delicious carbs than we'd need to run a dozen marathons each. Then, in the spirit of our upcoming commitment to good health the following morning, we walked over to Sandy's for frozen custard cones -- the sugars in the ice cream, we knew, would undoubtedly come in handy during the run. And the chocolate shell? Bonus! Unfortunately, after exchanging spirited high-fives in the restaurant parking lot and arranging our rendezvous point, our team captain drove home and proceeded to devour the slightly larger half of a watermelon.
So it was that we showed up at Town Lake the next morning - not light and springy as we'd fantasized for weeks, but weighed down by the unresolved excesses of the previous night and looking like the preggers Governator did in Junior. This being their first time organizing such a large event (that day we overheard someone mentioning that the SiLabs Marathon Relay was among the largest such races in the States, huzzah!), the staff made a few blunders, the most glaring that they'd allocated far too little parking space in the lot south of the river. We ended up having to have our teammate park the car far into Zilker Park while we half-jogged, half-rolled to the starting line, where the likes of Governor Rick Perry and Mayor Will Wynn had long since camped out. Thanks for shutting down the MoPac onramps, guys!
After the usual schtick about race traditions and several rambling speeches, some lucky designee sounded the starting gun and we were off! We dunno what the 5k and 10k routes were like, but we imagine they were very similar to the 12k, which took us westbound to Lake Austin Blvd with a turn at the Magnolia Cafe, eastwards along Cesar Chavez, clear through to Red River and finally down to somewhere near Festival Beach where we did the turnaround and repeated much of the same course.
Because it was: a) so early, b) so hot, and c) so unadvertised, there were fewer than a dozen spectators on the course - save for the occasional hung-over bum, traffic cops ensuring our safety, and the hundreds of wonderful volunteers passing out water and Powerade every half-mile. On our way back we found ourselves virtually alone at Congress and Cesar Chavez, affording us a very cool Vanilla Sky moment as we briefly stopped to admire the Capitol building ten blocks away with nearly no cars in sight.
The final stretch of the course was packed with spectators, who were happily encouraging us to finish by their cheers. We busted our asses to make a grand finish, hoping perhaps to dazzle that cutie on the sidelines with whom we were obviously destined to have amazing pornstar sex. The makeshift baton was a bright red wristband, similar to the Live Strong bracelets, which we were all-too happy to pass on to our teammate after we crossed the finish line – by then we’d long but lost sight of our newest stalking victim. And from there it continued, with the sun gradually creeping out past the clouds and raising the temperature to well over 100 degrees while the teams plodded on.
The stars of the day were Austin's finest - the Police and Fire Departments - who were not only participants in the race but on-hand to lend their encouragement and provide much needed logistical support. Next to the finish area was a yooooge red fire engine, with a big burly fireman perched atop it spraying the eager crowd below with his massive hose – it was also nice when he used the truck’s as well. Giggle!
Close to noon, with the “winning” teams receiving their “trophies” from the “judges”, we left our makeshift race headquarters under the tent and trudged back to our cars. The morning was fitting penance for our weekend of self-destructive behavior, and in spite of our broken bodies we ended up having one hell of a good time. Oh Adonis physique, how close we are to thee!
...Until four of us headed over to Curra’s, where we each snorted a basket of chips and a whopping tub of everything-queso followed by an ungodly Tex-Mex feast. We can say without regret that those 3,000 calories never tasted better.
